birthday report

Last week at PT, a couple of the guys asked me what I was going to do for my birthday. Their suggestions: get a tattoo or go skydiving. Um, no and no. Apparently they don't know me very well. As Denise says, I am a low-level recreator.

I had a very relaxing birthday celebration that just kept going and going!

On Saturday, I went out to lunch and to a movie with Jill.

On Sunday, Marc stayed home with a sick Eva. I took the boys to church, then came home, blogged, and took a delightful nap.

Marc invited his family over and cooked my favorite dinner (lemon chicken, broccoli with blue cheese, and rice). Michelle brought her amazing spinach/strawberry salad and Grandpa Bob brought lots of beautiful fruit (Grandma Mim was sick and had to stay home).

Bob and Mim gave me the sweetest, most clever gift! Four numbered envelopes, one for each decade of my life. Each one had an age-appropriate card, a very nice hand-written message, and some cash. I'm going to have to remember that one.

Michelle gave me this book I have been wanting to read for what seems like forever, and 3 pieces of luscious wool felt. (I didn't even know it came in houndstooth and plaid!!)

I forgot to take a picture, but Emily gave me Adele's new album, which I secretly had been pining for – yes!

Marc also made my traditional German chocolate birthday cake. YUM.

He put Eva to bed and slept on the trundle bed in her room to make sure that I got to sleep through the night.

On Monday, I slept in until I woke up naturally, oh rare joy! Then I stayed in bed and read, one of my favorite things in life. I got up and got ready, even though I had no plans to leave the house. A day of not having to drive the kids anywhere, woohoo!

I opened Jessie's packages after I got up. She made me 9 cd's! So exciting. She made me tiny, fridge magnet-size mantras modeled after the canvas ones in her kitchen. I love them. She bought me 2 eyeshadows, nail polish, and eyeliner from Ulta (on my wish list), and sent two cute fabrics! A motherlode, for sure.

Jill stopped by with balloons and a drink from Sonic.

Patsy sent me this beautiful cookbook from Williams-Sonoma. It is chock full of photographs of Paris, and I loved flipping through and identifying some of my favorite haunts.

Marc hadn't shaved for several days, and as a joke, he created this mustache and goatee. Every time I looked at him, it cracked me up, because I have never seen him any way other than clean-shaven or a bit scruffy all over.

He took the kids out shopping, so I was treated to some time at home, alone (why is that such a delight?). I watched an episode of Pillars of the Earth while working on a wedding gift that is 4 months overdue (!).

I then went down to my studio to do some cleaning/organizing, while listening to some of my new cd's. It's hard to find the time to spend in there, so it felt amazing to have a couple of hours uninterrupted.

And, and, Marc took the boys to get haircuts. That is a gift!

Lucas wandered downstairs eventually and seemed anxious for me to come and see the gifts they had prepared:


Max bought me an iTunes gift card. I always think it is so sweet when kids spend some of their limited funds on someone else.

Marc got me all of these items from my Amazon wish list (the universal wish list is a brilliant idea).

The boys got me ankle weights, also from my wish list. (Gotta keep up my knee exercises, you know.)

Eva picked out this scarf for me and contributed her last $5 from her Christmas money. Apparently, Marc suggested several possible gifts, but she rejected them all until she saw this.

Marc also got me this Bosu ball, a late addition to my wish list, when I was looking around at PT trying to figure out how to replicate things at home. Everyone loves it.

My mom sent me a necklace, a pair of earrings, a Cutco vegetable peeler,

a cute glass butter dish, and some lengths of fancy silk ribbon.

My mom and dad also sent me a check to apply towards my pricey knee braces. Marc said I should use it for something fun, but I hurried and paid it towards our balance yesterday before I could change my mind.

We were going to all go out to dinner, but Eva was still too sick, so we just got Mexican take-out instead. I watched Chuck with the boys and then House with Marc. Definitely my kind of day.

Tulips from Marc – I love spring!

Amy M. sent me this darling necklace! (It's silver, not gold, that was just a weird reflection.) I love the sentiment and the camera charm.

Last night we had our book club birthday celebration for Collette and me. It felt strange not to bring a dinner contribution when I knew they would be short-handed, but also nice to be a little bit spoiled.

Collette brought me this darling bag with HOPE coasters inside. Perfect!

Check out this card/gift certificate holder that Amy made. Seriously. The girls gave me a g.c. to Amazon, which kind of makes you feel like you have a world of possibilities in your hand. (Because you do.)

Today I got this gift from Kacey – a little tin of covered buttons. That is genius.

And a card from my grandpa with cash inside!

I have been so spoiled the last few days. It was actually hard to return to normal life, packing lunches, driving kids, going to the doctor, doing laundry and grocery shopping. Can you get used to a life of luxury that quickly?

And in case you were wondering, I think I'm over the anxiety about turning 40. It feels a lot like 39, and 38, and 37...

lesson (re)learned

Apparently Mondays are just really busy around here, today even more than usual.

I had to take Eva to dance and get her dressed there, much to her distress. (Not because of any modesty issues, just that she could hear the music starting and was worried they would start without her.)

Lucas needed my help (a lot) to put together the display board for his science project. (Which we thought wasn't due until Wednesday.)

At 6:45, when we hadn't eaten and we were still in the throes of the formatting and printing and cutting and gluing, I was about ready to say we would just have to postpone family home evening until another night, but Eva was in charge and she was not going to wait one more day.


She gave us all a piece of paper and instructed us to fold it in half and cut out a heart. She assigned us each a member of the family to make a valentine for. She recommended quite strongly that they should include animal drawings.

She was definitely enjoying her reign.

Marc brought out the old Dad humor and made me a "Hop you will bee my valentine!" picture.

Max's was hilarious – all about cows and math. Drawings of stick cows and equations. He colored the back to look like cowhide and wrote "I'm cownting on you to be my valentine!" for Marc's benefit.

Lucas drew pictures of Max's favorite animals: cow, pigeon, emu, and flamingo (not sure if that last one is a favorite, but he really does love birds).

I gave Eva the one I made for her – a cat with one of those standard "purr"-fect messages. She looked underwhelmed.

Then I noticed she was writing a message to Lucas on the back of his valentine:

"O haw nis you are
You allwas promis to playe
You are a good bruthr."

I took back the one I had made for her and wrote a message on the back. She beamed.

This time it wasn't the children who needed a time out to regroup as a family. I needed it most of all. I came away energized, more patient, less tired. When will I learn?

some sort of complex

{the face of introspection}

I had an embarrassing moment of self-discovery about a month ago.

Marc and I went to see Inception. We really enjoyed it. It's the kind of movie that you want to see again, knowing what you know at the end, to see how different it is the second time around.

Anyway. The ending is somewhat of a cliffhanger in that you are left not really knowing how it all pans out. The audience audibly showed their frustration at the very end.

And what was my reaction? I was mentally applauding them, thinking, "Go, Oremites! You got it!"

What the?! Why would I think that my fellow movie-goers would be any less capable of understanding the movie than Marc and myself?

This event plunged me into a bout of introspection. Do I think I'm more intelligent than the average joe? Do I have a superiority complex?

This is terrible.

(Not that I came to a conclusive answer, but it's terrible even to have to contemplate.)

. . .
fast forward
. . .

I feel down. I am beating myself up. About everything. I feel incapable of doing all that is required of me. I must be letting everyone down. What am I doing now that will put my kids in therapy later? (This is not an uncommon train of thought.)

So do I have an inferiority complex?

Can you simultaneously feel superior and inferior? Or alternate betwixt the two? Because it feels like I have some sort of complex.

a slight misstep

On the night of July 23rd, the kids and I were loading up the van with our suitcases. We had planned to stay the night with Marc's parents in Salt Lake so that we wouldn't have to wake up quite so early for our 6:00 a.m. flight to North Carolina the next day.

All was out of the house, and I was carrying my suitcase down the outside stairs when I stumbled. I don't know if it was maxi-dress I was wearing, or the flip-flops, or what, but I just fell on the concrete stairs and my suitcase tumbled down without me. My right foot twisted and went underneath me, and it hurt. Oh it hurt.

Marc was out of town. I couldn't put any weight on my foot. I looked across the street and remembered that my neighbor Heidi was out of town. I just sat there for awhile and cried. Lucas started to cry a little because he was upset by seeing me cry. Eva went over to the other side of the driveway and muttered, "This is so disappointing!" Max ran inside to call 911. I was shouting after him to definitely NOT call 911.

My cute neighbor Traci (who is actually one of the sisters that I visit teach) came over because she had seen the boys putting the suitcases in the van and wanted to know where we were going. By that time, I had formulated a plan to drive myself over to InstaCare, but then I had to admit that there was no way I could drive.

Traci brought me some crutches and took me to go get x-rays and Eva wanted to come along – she found the whole thing fascinating, so I guess maybe the excitement mitigated her disappointment somewhat...

Good news! Those delicate bones across the top of the foot were not broken, I had merely strained all the ligaments. They sent me away with a lovely therapeutic shoe and a prescription for pain meds.

Marc's parents had to drive down and pick us up. We didn't get to their house until almost 11:00, and then they fed us a huge dinner because none of us had eaten. I think I finally fell asleep around 12:30, and then we had to wake up at 3:45.

In the airport, I had to be pushed around in a wheelchair. I won't lie, it was a little bit mortifying. My kids were champs about everything, and Eva didn't even whine about having to walk while I rode!

Fortunately I only had to use the crutches for 2 days, and then I could just slowly hobble around.

Still, it did put a bit of a damper on my beach vacation.

The people at InstaCare told me my foot should be healed in 2 weeks. It's been 4, and I'm still wearing that blasted shoe.

Eva asked me the other day when I was going to stop wearing it, because, "No one thinks that that looks good." Thank you, dear.

After hearing a real scare story from Heidi yesterday, I decided to go in for a follow-up visit, just to make sure that all was well. I had to get more x-rays today, just to be safe. (No results yet.) I was told that the stabilizer shoe isn't helping anymore, and that I should be wearing something with good support, like tennis shoes. Great... I'd like nothing more than to have to wear tennis shoes around all the time! At least with the dumb shoe, everyone knew I wasn't wearing it as a fashion statement! Sigh. I guess I have no real choice, especially since my foot is still swollen and I can't squeeze it into any other shoes. But at least it's not all purple anymore, that was rather disgusting.

So. That seems like a rather long tale about a slight misstep, but it also seems to have defined my last month, so there you have it.

potential problems

I was gone for part of the kids' Spring break, but I felt like I had to take them to do something fun, so we went to Nickel City – an arcade where all the games take nickels. (It sounds cheap, but we still managed to blow through $25 in seemingly no time.)

Potential problem #1:

I discovered something rather unsavory about myself. Apparently I could very easily turn into a gambler, if I allowed myself to go down that road.

Thankfully, I didn't start playing this game until my nickels were nearly gone, because when I ran out, I was pawing through my purse to see if I had any more!

And for what? These stupid tickets! Why are these tickets so intoxicating?!

What do those stupid tickets get you? Ridiculous, cheap trinkets. Good grief.

I'm just thankful that my church advises against gambling. (I've never even been tempted. Who knew Nickel City could be my undoing??)

Potential problem #2:

I went out in the car with Eva the other day to do an errand. I drove out to the main intersection near our house, where there was a green light. As I got to the intersection, my mind went completely blank. I could not remember where I was going. At all. I didn't know if I should go straight or turn right.

I panicked for about 3 seconds. Then something clicked and I remembered I was going to Costco. Disaster averted.

I'm too young to be having senior moments! (Aren't I?!)

foolish girl

Foolish, foolish girl. That's what I feel like today, for many reasons:

I took the kids to the Champ de Mars on Saturday evening. When I was going to bed later that night, I went to get my book (The Birth of Venus) out of my purse. I had about 30 pages left, and was planning to finish it in bed. Imagine my dismay -- nay panic! -- when I realized I had forgotten my book on the park bench! So not only did I not get to finish the book (and Jill told me the last 30 pages were the best part of the whole book -- figures), but here's the kicker: I lost my bookmark as well! Not just any bookmark, mind you, but the cutest bookmark that Jenn made me for Christmas, which listed all the books I have read so far this year!!! I am truly mourning the loss of that bookmark...

Last night I took off after Eva was in bed (how was I to know that she would be getting out of bed several times? eek!) and went to walk along the Seine and look at bridges, something I have been wanting to do for quite some time. It was really fun, even though I didn't get any fabulous photos. The sun didn't go down until about 10:00, and then the golden lights that shine on all of Paris's monuments slowly started to turn on. I got to the Pont Alexandre III and thought, I might as well just keep going until I get to Trocadero, then I can cross over and get some up-close night shots of the Eiffel Tower, too! Oh I'm afraid my eyes were much bigger than my feet...


It really didn't look that far, it seemed totally doable. But after I had crossed several more bridges, I had to finally admit defeat. I had been walking for almost 3 hours, I was walking slowly and with a limp, and I knew there was no way I was going to be able to walk that much further and still make it home. As it was, I barely made it home! (Incidentally, last night was the only time I have ever felt slightly unsafe in Paris -- I was walking in some pretty dark, secluded spots on the quays, and I feared my gimp might make me seem like a vulnerable target!)

Today I thought I would take the kids on the bus over to play at Luxembourg. It seemed like the ultimate plan because they would have fun and I wouldn't have to walk much (paying the price for that long walk last night). Max said he didn't want to go (?) so I left him at home. Lucas and Eva had a good time playing on the playground (they'd have to be crazy not to). We went across the street to get some of that fantastic gelato. I ordered some for the three of us, and the woman handed me Lucas's cone. As I turned to hand it to him, I saw in his face that he was sick. He went dashing for the bathroom as his cone melted in my hands. Then the woman handed me Eva's cup. I turned to give it to her, and saw that she had fallen asleep. OK. So I ate my gelato, threw theirs away, and we headed home on the bus. Lucas closed his eyes the whole time and when I asked how he was doing, he said it hurt too much to talk. Sigh.

Eva slept just long enough in the stroller to refuse her regular nap today and was beginning to show signs of fatigue and crabbiness. I had the great idea to take her one stop -- just one stop -- on the Metro to go to a big grocery store. I had to pick up a few things, and I wanted to look for a book for Marc. The store is right by the Metro exit, so I left the stroller behind and let Eva walk. What was I thinking?? (I was thinking it would be easier to handle than carrying the stroller up and down the Metro stairs.) She could not believe her good fortune, and she did great... until we were ready to leave the store. Then she sat on the floor and refused to walk, crying and making a scene. I had to carry her and my purchases, and need I remind you about my gimpy gait? Sometimes I wonder why I try.

This is where I need to be right now... on someone's houseboat on the Seine.