Sunday thoughts

In Senior Primary today, I felt prompted to share something that I found online recently. It was a chart taken from the 1978 Ensign.

I started out by telling the children about Sister Beck saying that learning to recognize the promptings of the Spirit and act on them is the most important and valuable skill you can acquire in this life. I firmly believe that if our children can learn this skill, they will be okay, no matter what situation they find themselves in. More than okay, in fact - happy and successful.

When you have the Spirit:

You feel happy, calm, and clear-minded.
You feel generous.
Nobody can offend you.
You wouldn't mind everyone seeing what you're doing.
You feel like praying.
You feel in control - you don't overeat or sleep too much; you don't feel uncontrollably drawn to sensational entertainment, lose your temper, or feel uncontrollable passions or desires.
You are glad when others succeed.
You feel confident and are glad to be alive.
You wish you could keep all the Lord's commandments.
You think about the Savior often and lovingly; you want to know him better.

When you don't have the Spirit:

You feel unhappy, depressed, confused, and frustrated.
You become secretive and evasive.
You don't want to pray.
You avoid people, especially members of your family; you are critical of family members and Church authorities.
You get discouraged easily and wonder if life is really worth it.
You find the commandments bothersome, restricting, or senseless.
You don't want to go to church, or take the sacrament. You wish you had another church job or no job at all.
You hardly ever think of the Savior; he seems irrelevant to your life, or worse, part of a confusing system that seems to work against you.

I really hope that our discussion helps them to recognize when they have the Spirit and when they don't, and it is a great refresher for me as well.

wordless Wednesday

Sunday thoughts

Today was our ward conference, and while it was all good (even the 7:30 meeting I had to attend!), the thing that stuck out the most was this experience shared in Relief Society:

A young mother (YM) was struggling with a difficult morning, rushing to find shoes for her preschooler and get out the door while the other children were crying for various reasons. The phone rang. She debated about answering it. She picked it up, and it was her visiting teacher (VT).

VT: How are you doing this morning?

YM: Oh, fine!

VT: Really? Let's try that again: how are you doing this morning?

YM: Great! (thinking: I just need to get off the phone!)

VT: That's not what I heard.

YM: (looking out the window to see which of her neighbors might have seen her frustration) Why, who have you been talking to?

VT: Heavenly Father.

The visiting teacher arranged to lend a hand that day. The mother was incredibly humbled to realize that 1) Heavenly Father was aware of even her more minor distresses, and that 2) her visiting teacher was praying for her consistently and receiving direction as to how to be of service.

This took place several years ago, and the mother (who was our speaker) ran into her former visiting teacher recently. She told her that she would be relating this experience in ward conference and the other woman said, "I don't even remember that." This humbled the mother further, to think that such incidents are such a part of her friend's life that they don't even stand out in her memory.

It's wonderful to think that we can make a big difference in each others' lives, and that sometimes by very small means are great things brought to pass. I know I'm inspired to do better.

Sunday thoughts

This weekend I went to Time Out for Women with Mim and Michelle. Oh my! It far exceeded my expectations. 4000 women gathered to learn together. Much laughter and many tears, shared with two of my favorite women.

The theme was "We hope all things...," taken from President Uchtdorf's talk about infinite hope. Every talk was wonderful and inspiring. I took so many notes! I think I will share them one at a time, because typing them all in at once is a bit overwhelming.


Virginia Hinckley Pearce

What is a successful life? How do we measure progress and success?

Beware of false measures of success.
Get out of the business of competition. (Amen, sister.)
Comparison is the fast track to misery. It takes the fun out of life. Just make a conscious choice not to do that.

Money, children's accomplishments, even wonderful things like missions and temple marriages are not accurate measures of success. We cannot measure our success based on the actions of others who have their agency. (My grandma used to say that you can't take the credit for the successes of your children; and you can't take the blame for their failures, either.)

Discouragement weakens your faith. It is not pleasing to the Lord when we worry endlessly.

Good measures of progress and success:

Am I stretching and growing? Move just a little beyond your current capacity.
Do I trust Christ?
Am I striving to obey his commandments?
Am I taking advantage of his atoning sacrifice to develop Christlike attributes?
Am I losing my disposition to do evil?
Am I beginning to see things and people as Heavenly Father and the Savior do?
Am I working hard?
Do I love people and desire their salvation?
Can I feel the Holy Ghost working through me?

The single most important skill we can acquire in this life is to qualify for, receive, and act on personal revelation. This is also the best way to avoid comparison because the Spirit will tell you how you stand before God, if you are progressing, what you need to change, and how to do it.

We must know that the course we are pursuing is in accordance to the will of God, and the Spirit can confirm this to us.

When we are filled with the Spirit, we have souls that are satisfied. He can fill every need, every longing, every vacuum. It is impossible to feel despairing when we are filled with the Spirit.

Celebrate your own growth and that of others.

Peace, joy, and hope are available to those who measure success properly, and this is success that no one can take away from you.


I loved every little thing about this talk. Such a good reminder about how we view success, and wonderful ways to gauge our progress. Yes, I have a long way to go, but I can also see that I'm much farther along the path than I was 5 or 10 years ago. I'm excited and motivated to keep pressing forward!

(**Max was away at a swim meet and Marc was shooting a wedding, so Grandpa Bob took Eva and Lucas out on a grandparent date yesterday. They went to the planetarium, out to lunch, and to the Museum of Natural History. My kids are so lucky! And so am I.)

cool interview

Another blogger did an interview of Marc and his photography. She selected some beautiful photos to highlight, and I even learned a couple of things I didn't know!

Check it out here.

He's a pretty creative guy.

Sunday thoughts

We went to a fireside tonight about the new Fulfilling My Duty to God program. I have to say, it was very inspiring.

The program has changed from more of a checklist-type experience to a learning and growing, testimony-building, life-changing experience.

The parents need to be really engaged with their sons, and I can see how working on these goals and plans together could change this relationship for the better – broaden it, solidify it.

I'm feeling a little bit overwhelmed by my life right now (just got called to be the YW secretary today, in addition to my new RS activities calling and depression seems to be nipping at my heels), so a little part of me wanted to say I couldn't add this to my list of responsibilities. But a much bigger part of me is saying that I absolutely need to do this, that this could be turning point. A lioness at the gate would do this to prepare her sons for missions, for life.

At the very end of the program, our bishop spoke for a few minutes. I love our bishop. He talked about two Norway spruce trees that his parents planted on their property around the time of his birth. They have grown to be 60-70 feet tall, and his parents wondered if they were a danger to the house. They called a tree specialist out to take a look. The arborist looked at the ground around the trees. He said, "You've used flood irrigation on these trees, haven't you?" The parents confirmed that they use flood irrigation, or in other words, they flood the yard once a week or so. The specialist told them that because they use that method of watering, the roots have to go deep to find the water and that those trees are completely stable, with no need to worry about their ever falling over.

He encouraged us to fully embrace the new Duty to God program, that it is a way of providing flood irrigation of a spiritual nature to our sons. What mother wouldn't want that?

Come to think of it, I could use a little flood irrigation myself.

link love

Just a few of my recently starred items in Google Reader:

Check out this food ballet! So clever.

And this way cool card holder! {photo from Stampington}

Click here to see a tutorial and patterns for some way cute outdoor patriotic pillows!

I've been rediscovering embroidery lately after years and years away. It is so fun, very inexpensive to do, and the possibilities are limitless. Here's a project for very young children – I think I'll invite Eva to embroider with me!

I really want to make this ice cream dessert.

David Lebovitz did a post called "Should I move to France?" Man, that cracked me up.

Look at this roundup of skirt patterns! It really makes me want to sew.

One of my favorite posts from Neighbor Jane Payne. If you don't read her blog, you should. It's chock full of wit and wisdom.

These banana pops bring back fond memories of my childhood! I think I should introduce them to my children.

I can't decide which I love more, these free printable tags or the inspiration board and color palette. Eye candy.

Will I ever tire of ruffles and flowers? Seriously. I don't see it happening.

As a general rule, I don't use cake mixes, but I might make an exception for this caramel cake. Or maybe just make that frosting and put it on my own yellow cake...

five for Friday

1. Our Blue & Gold banquet was last week. I was totally impressed by the invitations:

Definitely the cutest I've seen for such an event. I don't know who made them, but I will be keeping mine in my inspirations file.

We had to bring a decorated cake. We found this out on Monday night (the banquet was on Wednesday). I made a yellow cake with cream cheese frosting from scratch (I still have my standards), but took the easy route on the decorating. It won the "Scoutiest" award.

2. I'm finding it cool that my brother and sister are both on Facebook. I was checking in there yesterday and saw all three of our profile pics on the same page. There was something about it that just made me happy. I was examining the pictures to see how we all look alike or different. And I thought, "these are my peeps!"

3. The other day, I was taking Eva to preschool and there were snow flurries in the air. We looked down and discovered that the snowflakes looked just like the ones you see in depictions of snowflakes, but don't usually see in real life. Six-pointed, intricately detailed, beautiful. We were almost ridiculously excited. I tried to capture some, but they would melt almost immediately upon hitting our coats or the car window. (I'm somewhat disturbed by all of the hairs/fibers on my coat in this macro view.)

4. Max had the opportunity to play at Abravanel Hall on Monday with the Utah Valley Youth Symphony. They had a 6 a.m. rehearsal and took a 7:00 bus to Salt Lake. The boys had to have a black suit and bow tie, which we had to scramble to get in a hurry. He had a marvelous time.

{This isn't the best photo, but Grandma Mim wanted to see him in his suit.}

5. On Monday, I had to take Lucas and Eva back to the doctor (sinus infections again). We then went to the pharmacy to pick up their prescriptions. As we walked in the door at home, Max informed me that Jill had just left. She had brought me our book club book and a big Sonic diet Coke. And she had cleaned my kitchen -- apparently she can't help herself. I found this self-portrait she took on my camera. I love surprises like that.

drowning in good ideas

It's funny, I sat down to post last night, and looked at Jill's latest post first. She wrote about just what I was going to. I went to bed instead.

But today, I'm going to do it anyway. You know, because this is my record. So feel free to skip it, if you like.

Collette invited us to an 8-week organizing class taught by Marie Ricks from houseoforder.com. I think I am a prime candidate for such class. So much, in fact, that after attending the lecture last week, I felt completely overwhelmed. I didn't do one thing differently last week. I think Jenn said it best when she said, "I'm drowning in good ideas."

This week was different. I felt really motivated, and I've already started to make some changes.

But first, my notes:

Kitchen organization ideas

- Clear off the counters. When we place something on the counter, it gives everyone else permission to put stuff there as well. (Isn't that the truth?) If you keep surfaces clean, people are less likely to dirty it.

- Are the items on our counters "friends" or "freeloaders"? If something could go somewhere else, try to find it a different home. (example, she found she didn't really use her knife block, so she got rid of it. And she hates the way toasters look, so she keeps hers in a cupboard.)

- Put the things you use most within easiest reach.

- Get rid of anything that doesn't work.

- If there is anything that doesn't really belong in the kitchen, move it.

- Use drawer dividers, even ones that you make out of boxes if necessary, to maximize your space and minimize shifting.

- Drawers are more useful than shelves. Wherever possible, use dishpans or other inexpensive, open containers to create a pull-out drawer.

- Store like things behind like things, unlike things next to each other.

- Go to work with what you have and make it work for you.

Paperwork

- Papers that are confined or kept for the long-term should be in files. Papers that you use frequently should be in binders.

- Create a household binder with a tab for each family member. Store schedules and the like behind each person's tab. Have a numbers tab where you keep important phone numbers, account numbers, etc. Copy everything in your wallet and file it here for use in case of theft.

- Journal binders. Create a binder for each family member with tabs for each year of his/her life. It's just as easy to file them in a binder as in a file, and it will be complete when a child leaves home. Children will be much less likely to organize their papers later on, so this is a gift to them. File important papers and a sampling of the best school papers from each year. Be selective about what you save and file.

- Create an identity binder with copies of important documents. Keep one in a safety deposit box. Include detailed physical descriptions, photographs, fingerprints, copies of social security numbers, driver's licenses, birth certificates, deeds, insurance info.

This is where I felt completely overwhelmed. I think this is all good information, and I'm keeping it to work on at some point. Just not right this minute. Now on to the part that really got me thinking and moving.

Time management

- He who prepares early prepares without work. (example: looking at your Primary lesson at the beginning of the week means that your mind will subconsciously be working on it all week long, making connections, getting ideas -- much better than waiting until Saturday.)

- The law of firsts: When you put the most important things into your day/week/month first, everything else fills in nicely. (examples: pay tithing as soon as you are paid, exercise in the morning, do your visiting teaching by the 15th, read scriptures in the morning, pay bills at the first of the month)

- We cannot neglect the law of firsts with our families and have our children grow up to be safe. If your spouse will not support you in this, do it alone.

- You will be blessed by aligning your priorities with the Lord's.

- Evaluate activities that are important vs. activities that are urgent. Try to address the urgent things that come up before they become urgent. Most of us live on the edge in one way or another. (examples: letting our prescriptions get to the very end before we refill them, running out of printer ink or gas in the car, etc.) Move away from urgency.

- What are we avoiding or postponing? Address those things.

- Think of your life as a wagon wheel. You are the hub. Take care of yourself first, then your spouse, then your children and any of the other spokes coming out from you. Then turn your attention and energy (if any remains) outward to the world. So many of us have this reversed.

- Figure out what your prime time is every day. When are you most alert, have the most energy? Do important tasks then. Take advantage of your natural energy highs and lows.

- Take advantage of your most alone time every day. True alone time means that no one is asking you a question, you don't have to answer the phone, and there is no media interrupting your spirit. Use your most alone time to: plan, prepare, think, and ponder. We all have more peace and calm when we have at least some alone time every day.

- A child who is loved well becomes a mighty force for good. Whatever stage of life you are in, saturate yourself with its joys.

- Only when we give up what doesn't matter are we empowered to do what is really important.

- Schedule more "launch time" and "land time" for your tasks and activities. We live in halfway houses of clutter because we don't take time for landing, or putting things away completely.

- Don't answer the phone 20 minutes before you need to leave or you will be late.

- The spirit of a family on Sunday is determined by the mother's mood as she enters the chapel. Increase your launch time.

- Address whatever is not working and figure out how to make it work.

- Never wait uselessly. Have a plan of what you will do during wait time: read, write a note, find an opportunity to teach something to your children.

- Whenever you say yes to something, you are saying no to something else, and vice versa. Pull back and evaluate so you can make decisions with wisdom.

- Take control of your own life.

- Don't mistake activity for accomplishment. Do things less often, but better, and double your capacity. A different approach can make you much more efficient.

- Give yourself permission to play. The person who never plays is not fun to be around. Allow yourself, your spouse, and your children to see the fun side of you. (I am choosing to interpret this as playing games and doing things that are fun to me. Quite often, the things that Eva wants me to do are not fun to me. At all.)

- Alternate what you are doing to give yourself energy to go on. Vary active tasks with sedentary ones, boring tasks with stimulating ones, activities we enjoy with those we don't. Stop before you are tired whenever possible.

- When planning your day, divide it into 6 sections: already in cement, things I would like to do, odds & ends, dinner, sit-down activities, and inspiration. Also, make your life easier by figuring out what you'll serve for dinner before noon.

This, in particular, made me think. I am queen of making lists, but often I'm not so good at prioritizing tasks. I tried it yesterday and was thrilled. I certainly didn't accomplish everything on my list, but I did do the most important things.

Better still, I felt completely in charge of myself yesterday. I felt like I could do anything. I felt like changes were on the horizon. Like this was going to be a great year. It was so empowering!

(So what happened today? Well, it was Creative Friday and I didn't really have any other obligations, so I didn't even make a plan for the day.)

Sunday thoughts

Our sacrament meeting today was about receiving individual spiritual direction.

- One of my darling former Laurels was the youth speaker. Her seminary teacher gave the class a challenge to pray, read the scriptures, and write in their journals every day for 30 days. She said that she had never felt as in tune with the Spirit as she did during those 30 days. Her teacher encouraged them to choose a partner, and the partners reminded each other about their commitment. When the 30 days was over, she and her partner decided to continue reminding each other for the rest of the year. I thought this was brilliant.

Other highlights:

- The Lord will not force you to learn - you must authorize the Spirit to work in your life.

- Anger, fear, pride, and sin can overpower the delicate promptings of the Spirit. If we want to receive personal revelation, we must work to eliminate these things from our lives. We must be worthy to receive it.

- We will hear and notice the things that are most important to us. If we are earnestly striving to recognize the promptings of the Spirit, we will.

- One mother related many examples of times throughout her life when she had to seek guidance from the Holy Ghost: as a mother of young children, a mother of teens, as a grandmother, and now as a daughter caring for an aged mother. She received guidance every time and found words that were not her own to help her comfort, teach, and help. (Oh, how I need that help!)

- As mothers, we do not receive promotions, awards, or accolades. But when we are obedient and strive to follow the Savior's example, we will receive confirmations that what we are doing is pleasing to the Lord.

I loved these messages. I know that I really need daily spiritual guidance, especially as a mother. And I know that I can receive it, if I seek it and work on my own personal worthiness. Now I only have to remember that and go to work!

non-touristy tourism

On Saturday, we wanted to do something, but we didn't want to go anywhere too touristy because tourist sites on Saturdays are too much for me to handle. Marc suggested we go to the Palais Chaillot, a smallish museum with architecural facades. As it is up at Trocadéro, a place I knew I wanted to take Jill, it seemed like a good idea.

When we first arrived, we stopped to watch some guys break-dancing in front of the museum. I should probably say that they were learning to break dance. Break dancers in training, if you will. They had the desire, but they had a ways to go. (I am totally spoiled by having seen amazing breaking on So You Think You Can Dance and America's Best Dance Crew.)

How in the world did they get these things in here??

A girl sketching. I wish I could do this!

Possibly my favorite part of the museum (you know how I love text). Just lists of things that people like about living in Paris. I was inspired.

The funniest gargoyle I've ever seen. Jill named it "jet lag".


As always, when I look at sculpture, I am just amazed. I cannot fathom how anyone can start with stone and get things that look like draping fabric, hands, faces, lace. How do they do it??

Jill felt a blister coming on, but fortunately she had brought her blister band-aids with her, and so could do some preventive covering. So smart.

As we strolled up to this, I said, "oh look, a skeleton holding an apple." Then we got closer, and Max said, "Mom, the skeleton is actually holding a heart." Oops. That's so much creepier.

Museum study.

Museum fatigue.

It seems you can't go anywhere that has wide open spaces without seeing displays like this. One man kept coming up to us and saying, "Bling, bling, 1 euro." It's hard to believe, but I was somehow able to resist his sales pitch.

We took Eva down to the carousel, it was her promised reward for being good in the museum.

Then we bought more churros. Jill got one that looks like a J!

We got a late start and didn't leave until 2:30 or so. When we got back, it was 7:00 and I had to go to the grocery store, make dinner, give Eva a bath and get her to bed, and then plan sharing time for the next day. I was a mess. I do so much better when we get out earlier in the day and then come home earlier. I need to remember that.