Saturday, June 27, 2009

five years ago

Five years ago, my beautiful niece Lola was born, but never took a breath.

It was probably the worst day of my life, and she wasn't even my baby, so I can only imagine how painful it was for my sweet sister and her husband.

Today we visited her grave, as is our tradition on her birthday.

We cut some of our roses and placed them on her headstone.

We talked about her. My boys never got to see her, so I told them about how beautiful and perfect she was. Lucas was only four, but Max remembers that terrible day.

We tried to explain to Eva that Bella has a big sister who lives in heaven now. She didn't really understand, but she asked a lot of questions. I feel so blessed to know some of the answers, and to have faith that the rest will be answered someday.

16 comments:

Melinda said...

I just couldn't even imagine having to go through something like this. It would be the worst thing ever. That is so good of you to go and visit the grave site and remind your kids of the wonderful blessing of eternal families.

Jen said...

michelle, this post just makes my heart ache for your family- and especially for your sister. my older sister died at birth and my parents still grieve that (she'd be 33 now)- and when i'm home, i visit her grave.
it's a blessing to have answers in the gospel- and yet it still doesn't take the pain completely away.
sending hugs your way.

Jill said...

I can't believe it has been 5 years already, because that terrible phone call from you is still burned on my brain.

It's very sweet that you guys go to the grave each year on her birthday.

Hannah said...

These pictures are beautiful. Jessie is blessed that in their absence you carry on this birthday tradition. It is so bittersweet.

Natasha said...

I cannot even imagine the pain of losing a child, a first born. I love that you posted on this and that you all keep the memory alive and can take comfort in knowing you will be reunited with Loa again one day. My heart goes out to Jessie.

linda said...

Jessie is most fortunate to have such a kind, thoughtful and devoted sister. She loves you very much.

charlotte said...

I remember that terrible day. We cried and mourned at the Wood house. What a blessing that you live so close to her grave.

Fred said...

Thank you for such a tender and thoughtful post on Lola's birthday. I am so grateful that you keep the tradition of visiting the grave on her birthday. What memories this brings back!! It is nice that the kids are able to experience the occassion. Hard to believe that it has been 5 years since that terrible day!

Robyn said...

It hurts my heart to know that mothers have to go through this. Like myself, I know many women who have lost babies very far along in pregnancy, and like Jesse, babies born virtually on their due date and don't make it for some reason. I like to think that those little angels are so perfect and pure that they don't even need to come to this Earth and experience life. They just needed a body for a short time, then were taken directly to their Father in Heaven.

I think it's wonderful that you visit Lola's grave and teach your children such important truths about the Plan of Salvation. I'll be thinking of Jesse and saying a little prayer for her on this anniversary. I'm so glad that she has been blessed with two more beautiful, healthy daughters!

shannon said...

I remember when this happened...I was pregnant with my youngest daughter, Ellie. (I had her a month after Lola died). When your mom told me what had happened, my heart broke for Jessie and her husband and well, your whole family, really...

I, too, feel so blessed to have faith in knowing that someday, life's questions, that don't make sense now, will be answered.

The roses you put on her grave were so lovely...

Susan said...

Seeing Lola's grave stone and the kids paying tribute gives me great comfort and makes me feel like I too, am there. Thank you for these photos. The expessions on the children's faces are so sweet and reverent! The roses are just beautiful and tender (and so girly!)

I spent the day yesterday recalling the moment we got the call and at the same time, the strength and testimony building example of you and Jessie during the days following her death. Knowing that she will be in the celestial kingdom waiting for the rest of the valiant gives me comfort and desire to endure to the end!

5 years has gone by so quickly. There are several children in our Ward who are very close to Lola's age and I follow their growth constantly, imagining how Lola might be today. She has taught us all a great deal. Jessie is a wonderful mother and will know her fully.

I really do love the photos. Thank you for the tender rememberance that makes me feel as if I were there.

Kate said...

I can't even begin to imagine but my heart goes out to you and your family. I think that bringing flowers to Lola on her birthday is lovely.

Michelle said...

What a beautiful tribute!

Miranda said...

This post made me cry. Your beautiful faith is inspiring.

rebekah said...

i've noticed that tragedy acts as an anchor in our lives, a sort of new beginning where great levels of emotional growth and spiritual greatness can begin at. this is such a sad event, but your family is a witness that the Atonement takes the sting out of death, pain, suffering, and sadness. i hate the sting of tragedy, the initial shocking pain, and i am always thankful when it passes and i can move on in the mourning process.

Claudissima said...

ohhh my those pictures are priceless. I love what you mum said. You are a great sister and great mentor to your sister. What a blessing. To have them remember.

Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...