Two recent incidents that reminded me yet again how an ordinary person just going about her daily life can have an impact on others:
1. While getting my hair done on Saturday, I was telling my stylist about all of the bloggers I know who have recently become runners, or otherwise made big positive changes in their lives. I explained that while I am genuinely thrilled for all of your accomplishments, it has made me wonder more than a few times why I can't seem to pull it together and make the changes that I really want to bring about in my life. In my typically self-deprecating style, I said, "What is fundamentally wrong with me that I can't seem to do this?".
She walked away for a few minutes while my color was processing, and when she returned, she firmly put her hands on my shoulders, looked me in the eye and said, "There is nothing wrong with you." Then she told me her theory about how each of us has varying levels of energy, and we do what we can with the energy we have. She said she has observed my mothering when I have brought Max & Eva in for haircuts and she knows where most of my energy is expended. She spoke to me in such a serious, commanding, and slightly emotional way -- I felt as if I had no choice but to listen to her. It made me slightly weepy to have someone champion me in that way. I wish I could have her come over every day to reassure me there is nothing wrong with me!
2. During Sharing Time last Sunday, a member of our Primary presidency was teaching the children from the scriptures. She stopped and asked if they knew who put the little footnote letters in there. The children looked puzzled, and one girl tentatively said maybe the same people who wrote the scriptures. The pres. member just smiled and said, "No, actually, it was me!"
She went on to tell us that when she was in college, she was an exceptionally fast and accurate typist. One of her roommates had a data entry job, but then had to quit because she was moving away. This sister took over her job, and the data entry she was given ended up being all of the cross-references between the Book of Mormon and the Bible (at the time they each had their own footnotes but they didn't refer to each other). She worked on that project for eight years!
She explained to the children that she was absolutely nothing special, she grew up in Delta, but that she had a skill -- and that skill was put to use to do something that eventually would help many many people. She then told them that they would all have an important work to do, and that their job is to learn all they can and keep themselves pure so that they will be ready when it comes along.
I thought it was a great lesson for the children, and it got me thinking about what I could be doing, right now, to help others. I guess it's an every day -- and lifelong -- quest.
Friday, February 08, 2008
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17 comments:
Wow Michelle! That was a great post - very thought provoking. I am so grateful for people like your hair stylist that can make heartfelt & true statements like that.
Neat story about the DELTA woman - of course she is great, she's from DELTA. Way cool -
I love it that Sharolyn took you so seriously and was able to respond in a way that made you listen. You are quick to deflect compliments and reassurances, so it's very hard for them to get through to your core. No wonder you're often left feeling overwhelmed and without accolades.
I love the other story too, very interesting.
It makes me sad to think of so many grown ups walking around feeling like they don't count, when we would never allow of our children to think that about themselves. We have to be our own cheerleaders!
OH MY GOODNESS! I'm so glad you posted this Michelle. Thanks for taking the time to make a difference to all of us, your blog readers. I appreciate your thoughts and your willingness to expose your insecurities to help the rest of us.
Oh...great post michelle.
I want to have the wisdom & ability to do that for someone- (the hairdresser story) I guess I need to start with myself.
Thanks for sharing- I'm going to use that footnote story in primary this week! I've been teaching the song- Dare To Do right & we have been talking about the "WORK" that no other can do. perfect example!! THANKS~ PJ
I don't know anyone finer than you. Now I know that I am your mother, but it's the truth!
Those are wonderful thoughts to end my day on. In my aging years, I want to know what have I been prepared to do? I have been blessed most of my life from a young age to understand my individual worth. I still haven't perfected making my actions consistant with that knowledge.
Thanks for the introspective words.
Those are both great examples of how we regularly make an impact on those around us. All of us.
Everyone has moments of doubt, times when they don't think they are doing things right. Step back, and look around. See all the good things you've done. I guarentee you've done more good than you are willing to give yourself credit for.
I really loved this post. We all have different strengths, abilities, and allotments of time. Besides being a mom, you spend your time doing wonderfully creative things that you enjoy doing.
On that note, I would just add that I have really enjoyed learning (okay, well I didn't enjoy the learning, it was more when the realization came that I enjoyed it) that we all value things differently. And I think that placing a high value on motherhood and friendships is absolutely wonderful and you obviously value those two things.
The hair stylist story is awesome! I want to be that kind of person/friend!!! I love her insight on where your energy goes and how it shows through your children. I totally agree with her!
I tell myself all the time that I can only do so much in a day and that although my house isn't clutter free and fantastic, that it is my choice to use my time in the day otherwise, and that my season will come when the strains of motherhood are not as great and I can put more into the domestic side of my role.
Good post.
WOw! I love both of these stories. Your stylist is right, there is nothing wrong with you. I think the story about the footnotes is just fabulous, what a great way to teach these little children about the important work they are here to do as well. Love it!
Thank you for this post! I loved every bit of it! You have a very wise hair stylist, and my, oh my, what a powerful way to teach an important lesson! Thank you!
A kind word is just what we need some days. Last week (when I was having a much better posting week, creatively speaking) I posted about what we leave in our wake, our interactions with others...
your stylist left a lot of kindness in her wake yesterday-- and i know that your thoughtfulness regularly impacts others...
Such a fantastic post, Michelle...I saw the link on Jane's blog. And I'll agree with her comment that you definitely make a difference to all of your readers!
It sounds like your spending way to much of your energy thinking/comparing what you are not. When I read your blog or see what Jill has said about you. I see a wonderful friend who gives of her time and energy to be that good friend. You are so creative. I am awe at times when I see what you have been creating. You can cook really well something that I could envey really quickly. As I see or read what Jill say's you fix for food when she goes for creative friday. I once again am in awe of your ability to cook. We certainly can't do it all I would suggest that when you find your self thinking of all your not, that you quickly make a list of all you are. As I see it You are loved by sweet children who some day will Thank you for the time you gave them. You are loved by good friends. Kindness starts by being kind to our selves.
I think it's hard to look at the blogging community as a whole (or your relief society as a whole, your book group as a whole, your exercise class as a whole, etc. etc. etc.) and not notice all the things that others in the group do better than you.
I'm glad your hairdresser (who just might scare me if she talked to me so boldly) made you see sense. You are clearly a talented and accomplished lady yourself. No doubt, others out there see you and wonder why they can't create such beautiful things or present such scrumptious lunches to Friday friends.
Yesterday in Gospel Doctrine, we were having a very, very elementary discussion about Nephi, who I think deserves to be discussed with more depth than simply his obvious awesomeness. I mentioned that I think he might have been on the right track by mentioning and recording the things he was GOOD at (obedience). It's like it's sort of a template for the rest of us who don't see things as clearly. Ah...this is how the good guys do things. O.K. then.
Same. I write a lot about books. Not because I'm trying to say, "Look at me, I'm a great reader", but more like, "I read. This is something I know about. Let me share my knowledge with you, if you're interested." Yes?
I think that's what the runners are doing. Not personally trying to make me feel like a schmuck because I can't run for longer than a minute (sad) but simply sharing what they are good at.
I don't even know where I am in this comment anymore, and I believe it's my first one here, which I might have more appropriately kept short and sweet. Sorry:)
I linked over to you from Jill today.
Just wanted to say thank you for this post. It was really beautiful, and I really needed to read it today. Thank you!
michelle, why i am not reading your blog in a regular basis. this post is amazing.
don't be fooled that my runners energy is nothing more than an escape from bigger problems in my life - they are problems i would wish on no one.
i love that your hairdresser said that to you and gives me a bigger sense of responsiblity i have to friends.
that primary story needs to be in the ensign for all to read. please ask her to type that up that up and submit it, i am serious.
i live in a ward where i feel like everyone knows someone famous, i mean mormon famous. it is a ward full of connections and lots of money. i feel like all i hear is my brother in law the so and so, and everyone was married by a general authority. i feel like there are some people who find their identity by who they know in the church, since i have none of this, it kind of drives me crazy. i will tell you i would rather meet the woman from Delta any day before the woman who was married by the prophet. what a treat for those kids to hear that first hand as only she could tell it. thanks for sharing this.
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