standards night

Last night we had our YW standards night, and it was wonderful.

Elder Oaks's wife came and spoke to us about being daughters of a King.

She told us of a trip they had made to Africa, where the poverty is so pervasive that the young women don't have money for transportation, and sometimes don't even have paper and pencils, so they have to be very creative with their personal progress projects. One young woman that she met decided to express her thanks to every single person who did anything to help her for a period of one month. She thanked her parents for cooking meals, cleaning clothes, holding family home evening, and every other thing they did for her. She thanked her bus drivers. She thanked her teachers. She thanked the deacons who passed the sacrament and those who gave talks in sacrament meeting.

It changed her whole life.

She found she was a different person at the end of that month, because she was so much more aware of all of the people who blessed her life, and she was so filled with gratitude. You can't ask for a more worthwhile project than that!

Sister Oaks spoke of the challenges of being single for 53 years, marrying an Apostle of the Lord, and being a stepmother. She said that she is much more careful of the influences she allows into her home now that she is Sister Oaks, but that we can and should all be as mindful of allowing the Spirit to dwell with us.

She read a letter that she received from a newly-returned missionary. He expressed his gratitude to his mission president's wife and daughter for their modesty and their example. He had gone on a date with two other couples, and when his date showed up, she was dressed immodestly. He was embarrassed and uncomfortable the whole night. He thought, "so that's what kind of girl she is." Later, one of his friend's dates confessed that, when she saw his date, she thought, "so that's what kind of guy he is."

Sister Oaks talked about the influence that our young women can have, either positively or negatively, even in the clothing choices they make. She urged the young women to think about the kind of guys they wanted to attract and to dress accordingly.

I was reminded of the time I realized, I think I was about 16, the power I had over boys. The power all young women have over boys. It was a heady feeling, for sure. I was not as careful with that power as I could have been. It's something I want to remember to talk to my Laurels about.

She related a story about Elder Oaks. Apparently, when his daughter Jenny was younger, she would walk in the door after school and start dropping her backpack, her shoes, her books, even her slip along her path. Whenever he would come home, he would be frustrated to see all that she left in her wake, and would express his frustration to her. One day, he was reading in the scriptures:

Doctrine & Covenants, Section 1
25 And inasmuch as they erred it might be made known;

26 And inasmuch as they sought wisdom they might be instructed;

27 And inasmuch as they sinned they might be chastened, that they might repent;

28 And inasmuch as they were humble they might be made strong, and blessed from on high, and receive knowledge from time to time.

He felt impressed to let it go, to not be quick to chasten her when she made an error, but instead to focus on the positive things about her and about their relationship, so that when she sinned, she would talk to him about it. What parental wisdom.

Our bishop spoke for just a few minutes. He related an experience when he had gone to the Ford Motor Company for some training. The man who had recruited him from BYU was one of the head honchos at Ford, and he thought he would call up to his office from the lobby, just to see if he had a few minutes to chat. The man invited him up to his office and talked for some time. While they were talking, he got a phone call from the CEO. He explained that he was talking with Mark H., but that he would come when they were finished.

Well, the bishop was just floored that this important businessman would put off an even more important meeting just to talk to him.

As he was preparing what to present to the young women last night, he realized he had prepared much more than he could share in just a few minutes, so he offered a prayer that he might know what would be most valuable to our YW. His eyes filled with tears as he told us he had been impressed to tell them, "The Lord will take your call. As daughters of a King, you have access to Him at any time, in any place. He will always listen to you -- and answer as well."

I love our bishop. He is a humble man. And when he talks, you cannot help but listen. It is obvious that he is led by the Spirit.

At this point, Elder Oaks surprised everyone by entering the room. The bishop deferred to him to say a few words, but he politely declined, saying he couldn't add anything further.

After the talks, the young women and leaders sang Daughter of a King by Jenny Phillips. We had only had a chance to practice it twice, but we still had 3 parts represented and it was beautiful. As I looked out and saw all the teary mothers in the room, I was really touched. That always gets me, seeing the mothers being so proud of their daughters. I feel like a voyeur seeing such tenderness.

At this point, a sweet young woman offered the closing prayer, pleading for us all to remember the things we had been taught. The YW president presented a book and a certificate to each young woman, telling each one what just one of their many divine qualities was.

Elder Oaks shook hands with each one of us.

It was just a wonderful night, and I felt I would be remiss if I didn't record it here to look back on and remember.