love letter #2: lucas

{Lucas doing his usual mock battle with utensils as he unloads the silverware.}

Dear Lucas --

I love you. I can hardly even believe you are the same little boy who used to be so fearful and cautious about everything. Like the time you were too afraid to go sledding with Max, Landon and Whitney, but you covered it up gracefully by saying you just didn't like to sit on red things. Or the time you didn't want to go outside because there were kittens and butterflies out there (oh the terror). You used to be so shy, you didn't want to participate in all the fun at preschool.

Now you are one of the most outgoing kids I know! You didn't even think twice about changing schools to follow Max when you were in first grade, and you made lots of new friends with no trouble at all. Your teacher recently told me that you don't seem to care what your peers think of you, you just go your own way -- an enviable trait at any age. Example: when your classmates were critiquing each other's stories and advised you that your title was too long (My Dirty Room Is So Dirty It Swallows Me In Its Dirtyness of Evilness), you just shrugged and said you liked it. The title remained unchanged.

You have such a great sense of humor. I love your deep giggles when something gets you laughing. I love the way you look up to your big brother, and I love the way you play with your little sister and are so tender with her. I love reading with you and playing board games (I still can't believe you can kick my butt at Cities & Knights of Catan). I hope you'll understand if I sometimes tune out when you tell me every detail about your computer or video games, but you know I can't follow those complicated RPG things... I just nod my head and make appropriate mm-hmm sounds every now and then. Like your great-grandma Charlotte says, "Children aren't boring to me, but sometimes the things they like are."

I guess maybe you still harbor some of your fears, but you keep them inside, because you do occasionally have night terrors which are sad and a little frightening to your dad and me (although you don't remember them at all). And you do frequently get sick to your stomach, which may or may not be related to stress (another thing we have in common).

I hope you know how much I love you and always will, even when you don't recognize when you are whining, or can't seem to lower your voice when Eva is sleeping. And I hope you will never be afraid to follow your own path. You will always be my Lucas-Pookus.

Love -- Mom