I was a painfully shy child. (I'm still shy, but not painfully so.)
There is a tale in our family lore of a little friend I used to play with -- I'm guessing it was an arranged playdate -- who would point her finger at me and command, "Talk!". My mom used to try to cajole me to go outside and play. I preferred reading.
I loved to sing, but when my mom had me audition for a local musical (which I was already familiar with and loved) I was just too shy to show my stuff.
In high school, everyone thought I was a snob. I don't think I've ever been a snob, I'm just shy, dang it!
Fast forward 20 or so years...
I'm an introvert. I am a homebody. I have a hard time reaching outside of my comfort zone. So the friendships I've had in my life are usually the result of others who are more extroverted than I being persistent enough to chip away at the walls I've put up around myself.
and now we get to ...
Jill. My best friend. One who is persistent enough, and dedicated to friendship enough, to not give up on me. It literally took years, but we finally have gotten to a point where the awkwardness is gone (I hope!). I can and do talk to her about everything that goes on in my life and in my head. I even accept help from her! (sometimes)And because of her, I have even more friends. She didn't give up until I finally accepted her invitation to come to book club -- what a great decision that was! She got me to start a blog, and look where that's taken me. She is my role model of friendship, and she has transformed my life.
(By the way, I love how you can see tiny glimpses of our Creative Friday paraphernalia behind us, and Jill's cup of Sonic pebble ice.)
So do I play well with others? Well, I'm getting there. At least I've made a lot of progress!
And, just because I'm trying to push my comfort zone a little bit:
yep, an open-mouthed smile. (It's not that I don't like my smile, it's that I don't like what happens to the rest of my face when I smile with my mouth open.) And can you stand how photogenic Jill is?
30 comments:
I LOVE the open mouth smile, you look so happy. (PS - are you a blond now? I can't tell if it is lighting or not, I need to see the new hair.)
This is another cool, well written post. I have had similar feelings, I think people thought you were snobby and not shy because you have style. However, if you are frumpy and awkward they take shy at face value (I know about this first hand.)
It took me years to realize that Jimmy's "stuck up-ness" (mostly at church) was actually shyness. I liked him more when I figured this out. I kept accusing him of being unfriendly (which he is not, but he isn't usually a first move maker..)
Anyway, I am glad you are coming out of your shell and that I have gained you as a friend. I also credit Jill for many of my friendship skills.
I love both of your smiles and think both those pictures are so cute. Your friendship will Jill is one that I look up to and such an example of what a true friendship is. I love that you have been friends for so long.
Really love the smile!
BEAUTIFUL smile!!
your friendship with jill is so special. it's somehow refreshing to know that you have both put so much effort into building this friendship.
I love both of your smiles! Yours and Jill's friendship is such an example to all of us. It is that kind of friendship I think we all should strive to have in our own lives.
I'm so pleased that this post was easy for you and that you immediately thought of me. It's interesting (but true) that it literally took us years to get to such a comfy place with each other. I still can't believe it sometimes. It seems a fluke that we ever ended up as roommates in our first apartment and then that we reconnected so many times after that. I've often thought that it's because the Lord knew we'd need each other so much now.
Michelle,
What? You don't like your face in an open smile? No way. It's beautiful and brings out so much. You have a great option and can go either way.
Hallelujah to Jill for bringing you out in the open. I, for one, have benefitted greatly from your talents and insights.
Love,
Jane
You two are amazingly beautiful! What a sweet tribute to friendship! What a gift that you guys have given one another! Do you think that it was fate that brought you together in the first place? I think not! How terrific that you guys still live so close and have worked hard for that closeness of friendship. This is a huge blessing to find such a friend! Thanks for the inspiration!
I found your blog through Crystalyn and wanted to say hello. I love your post. I can completely relate, I am a total introvert, and have had a hard time letting people in. How great that you have found such a great friend!
i love the open mouth smile.
this post made me a little weepy.
and is that your straight hair or are you wearing a wig! you hair looks as smooth as butta!
shows you how much i know, i never would peg you as shy.
really great photos!
Hurray we can see your perlie whites! Not that we don't love your other smiles, but seeing another side is always fun too.
Your hair looks great--you guys are definitely meant for each other. Or as Forrest would say, just like peas and carrots. :)
I gasped (in a good way) when I saw that last picture of you, you have a beautiful smile, whether it is closed or open mouthed.
I definitely relate to this post. I am glad that I have friends who have lots of patience, because it definitely takes some time to crack my outer shell as well. I'm glad you've found such a great friend as Jill. Everyone deserves a friendship like the one you guys have! Thank you for sharing!
I linked to your blog thru Jenny's. What a huge blessing that you, and Jill have one another in eachothers lifes. The pictures of the two of you are adorable!
Those are beautiful pictures of you and Jill.
You are so blessed to have Jill. I really admire your friendship with her, it teaches me a lot about friendship and how I could be a better friend.
You and Jill really look like sisters in these pictures. How fitting.
Like everyone else, I like the open mouth smile.
What a really great smile. I have also been pegged as a snob for my shyness. I have had so many people tell that they though I was snobby until they got to know me. IT is hard to put yourself out there.
Glad you are getting out there and I am glad I have gotten to know you through blogging.
I love the open smile. YOu and Jill look great together!
Great post, so fun to read and get an idea of where you are coming from. I have become more quiet and introverted as an adult, but as a child I was WAY outgoing, outspoken, and just...out there. Your post made me wonder if through the years I have misjudged people, or missed out on good friendships because I thought people were snobs.
Very cute pictures!
what a great post that was michelle. so happy to hear that you have jill and best of all, you know what a blessing she is to you.
yay for best friends.
yay for knowing yourself and yet moving outside of your comfort zone.
People thought I was a snob too and it's great to have a friend who pulls you out!
I love your open mouth smile. You are so beautiful and I hope you never forget it.
I like how you said Jill has never given up on you. So important in a firendship when someone will stick with you during the ebbs and flows of life. Jill certainly is a great example of a friend.
I'm glad you are are getting over being shy. This means there is HOPE out there for me, too.
I, too have friendships because the other half of my friendships were persistent, patient, and looked beyond my shyness to see something other than a snob. It has also taken years for me to open up and be myself with one friend of mine. So glad your awkwardness is gone as well as mine.
Love the pictures of you and Jill, jsut beautiful!
I have, many times, been mistaken for a snob, when it's just so shy. I can totally relate to these feelings.
Beautiful pictures of a beautiful friendship. I think you both are incredibly photogenic. I love that you spent so much time getting to this comfortable spot -- no doubt you were meant for each other.
I think that last picture of you guys is great. I don't get why you wont smile with your mouth open... you are very photogenic.
I totally get the 'snob' thing b/c people think the same of me sometimes. (I got it all the time in high school) It's just that I am shy and insecure and it takes me a while to feel comfortable to let myself come out. The funny thing is, I am not really an introvert and once I am ready I love to be around people. Weird, I know. You are lucky to have a friend who persisted. You and Jill have an amazing friendship.
You look beautiful with that last smile. I've always been smile-shy and it's only been over the past few years that I've learned to just let it go. I really enjoyed this post. Jill truly seems like an amazing friend. And I'm sure she knows how to pick amazing ones in return, so that says a whole lot about you!
What a sweet tribute to Jill. And I love the pics of your hair straight. I guess you can do that in Utah, huh--that dry heat. You guys BOTH take great pics!
Very cute photos. You gals look ready for glamor! Oh ya-that would be Paris!! ;) ciao
You guys are my favorite.
The end.
I LOVE your hair! You and Jill are an inspiration to all.
I have missed out on a lot of extracurricular stuff because I was too shy to participate. Isn't it funny how us introverts are friends with people who pursue friendships with us?
oh lalalalalallala you both are gorgeous! its been fun catching up (not yet on Michelles...but it was nice to glance through!) I have missed tremendously my blogging world.!
lve you guys!
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